Wednesday, August 25, 2010

The Curse of Curly Hair

**I want to start off by saying that I realize these pictures are VERY embarrassing but they depict my real life and I want to share them with you. Next time you want to compliment me on my hair, please remember these pictures. There's no turning back now...

I have naturally curly hair. When I tell people this, they always say, "you're so lucky! I wish I had curly hair." They have no idea. I'm about to share with you, THE CURSE OF CURLY HAIR. It's a real thing. The following self-portraits prove it.

This is a ONE WEEK HAIR EXPERIMENT. I want you all to know what my annoying hair does so you can appreciate your own locks. 

Before I get into the really bad pictures, I want to explain why I straighten my hair so often. People with straight hair don't understand that curly hair is high maintenance. With curly hair, I have to wash, dry, and style it every day. With straight hair, I can wash, dry, and straighten it once and leave it for 3 or 4 days. That really comes in handy when I have to get 3 kids ready and out the door to school every day. So, one night last week, I straightened my hair and went to bed. When I woke up, I looked like this:
 DAY 1
All I had to do was run my fingers through my hair, put on some makeup, a little jewelry, and some actual clothes and I am transformed into this:
I was ready to walk out the door in 10 minutes flat. Don't I look happy about that? I left to run some errands and realized another bonus for straight hair. You can drive down the street with the windows down and look like this:
(I promise I was very safe taking this picture) and then when you stop at a stop sign, you look like this:
If I had my hair curly and down while doing that, my hair would be a giant puff-ball and I would have to return home immediately. Instead, I can run to Target, Borders, and Fred Meyer with no problems!
On Day 2 I woke up looking exactly the same as I did on Day 1 so I spared you a picture, but I wanted to show you that straight hair does have a few drawbacks. Pig-tails. They don't work for me. Maybe it's because I have so much hair or maybe it's because it's so coarse, but they tend to stick straight out when I try it. But I'm about to workout, so I have to put it back somehow. Obviously, this isn't going to work. So I try a ponytail.
Big surprise! It sticks straight out too! Even better, I get a cool little mohawk at the base of my neck. Oh well, It's better than the pig-tails, so I do my workout and wrestle with my 2-year-old a little.
After my shower, my hair still looks the same and I am thankful because I have lots of stuff to do and not enough time to do it.
I woke up to a very grouchy toddler (not a good way to start the day) and I was running out of patience in a hurry. I went into my room to vent a little anger (pictured above) and then took a few calming breaths and disentangled my fingers from my hair.
See? All better. Well, it's been 3 days and I had a serious workout yesterday, so at the end of the day, it's time to say goodbye to my straight locks and wash my hair. I went to bed with my hair wet and this is what I woke up to:
I know, it's not pretty. Also, not a good way to start the day. But, Tyler has a baseball game in an hour, so I had better do SOMETHING with it. I washed it again (hoping for better results) and after 3 handfuls of product -- hair glue, mouse, and gel -- and 28 bobby pins, I ended up with this.
Then, I think to myself, I don't really want my hair to look like this for a little league baseball game, so I take it all out and I am left with this mess:
What am I supposed to do with this?!?!? I decide that I've wasted enough time on my hair and I just throw it into a messy ponytail that looks just plain old messy (not cute messy) and run out the door.
You all know what my hair can/does look like when I do it curly, so I won't bore you with any GOOD pictures of me. Instead, I want to show you what it looks like when I take out the 5 lbs of bobby pins and climb into bed, and then what it looks like when I crawl out of bed. (please still be my friend after you see these pictures!!)
This is the post-ponytail hair. Not cute.

A flash is brutal first thing in the morning. Plus, we don't need any more pictures of me with no makeup. The world is a better place without them.
Here's a picture of me after I take out my hair for bed. (Don't you wish you were my sweet husband who comes to bed every night and gets to laugh at the craziness that is my hair?)

I thought about tying an M&M to this beauty and see if it would motivate me to keep moving all day. Decided to shower and get rid of it ASAP instead.

I have to warn you, DAY 7 is my favorite. This was taken this morning. Even better, I actually had to answer the door like this. I swear to you, I actually answered the door looking exactly like this:

That's it. That was my ONE WEEK HAIR EXPERIMENT. People say they are cursed with straight hair, well, curly hair is a curse too. In all honesty, I'm glad I have hair to complain about. Being bald would be a serious bummer. I can't believe that I am putting these pictures on here, but people deserve to know the truth! If you have straight, lifeless hair and you wish it was curly, THINK AGAIN! Sometimes less is more.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Uncle Douche-Bag

Ben's little brother (Zach, a.k.a Uncle Douche-Bag) is here for a week. This means that Ben doesn't sleep, my furniture gets moved around a lot, and we all laugh way more than usual. The kids love him and when it's time for bed, all they want is just a few more minutes to play with Zach. Even Tori likes him -- I'm not sure if he's happy about this development or not, but at least she's not screaming.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Our Day at the Clark County Fair

My kids love the fair. I mean, really, what's not to love? Freaky looking people walking around, people spending their hard earned money on a moment of fun for their children, teenagers making out on every corner, kids screaming when the tickets run out, and the intense look of pure joy when they get to go on that one ride that they have been waiting for. I'm glad the fair is only around for a couple of weeks because I can only handle going once a year. Here's some pictures from our trip last night:
(please note Nicole's outfit, she has a very unique sense of fashion. She fit in very well with the fair crowd.)

Friday, August 6, 2010

A Girl After My Own Heart

Tori loves wearing makeup. So do I. I wear makeup every day. Even if I am home all day and never see another living soul, I wear makeup. I swear Tori has developed a special sixth sense that tells her when I open my makeup drawer -- she comes running! She used to be content to let me put a little blush or lip gloss on her. Now, she wants to do it all herself. She does pretty well with lip gloss... as you can see, she doesn't do so well with mascara. :-)

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Bib Necklace

I saw a cute necklace on my friend's blog and I thought, "I could do that," so I put it on my mental to-do list (which is miles long, btw) and thought that I would just get to it when I have time. Yeah right, when I have "time" I just want to sit in front of the tv and pretend that I don't have a thousand other things that need to get done. But last night (at 11:15 pm) I thought I'd give it a try. Ben's out of town and I have a hard time sleeping when he's gone. I figured I would just get started and then when I was tired enough, I would just climb in bed and drift off happily to sleep. Instead, I stayed up until 1:30 am finishing the dang thing and I was so excited about it that I couldn't fall asleep until 2:30! Then at 3:00, Tori came in my room and that ended my peaceful night's sleep. Needless to say, I was pretty tired at church today, but I looked cute with my new necklace!

**I made this whole necklace with stuff I had at home. Spare buttons and beads, an old cloth diaper, the free diaper bag I got at the hospital (years and years ago) an old t-shirt, and some hot glue. I love it!